Hurry up and Wait!

In January I would have given life and limb...ok, just limb, to be such a short time away from reuniting with Mike. Now that we're here our house is filled with anticipation, gearing up, getting excited and it is almost painful! MJ is preparing everything from games he'll play with Mike to books they will read, food they'll eat and their special day, just the boys. The marble jar is practically empty except for the lingering smell from excited kids plunging their hands in it covered in lotion, water, food etc. Each marble touched representing a celebration and missed moment. So while I look at the full bag of spent marbles I can't help but feel sad for the days gone by. The first sentences uttered by the baby girl he left behind turned little girl in his absence. The completion of preschool, loss of a first tooth, and sprouting body of a young man in MJ. And perhaps the biggest growth is in my realization that Mike was right when he left, that the completion of this challenge has granted me such a feeling of accomplishment. Surprisingly I'm slightly (perhaps only very slightly) sad that I have to share the daily blessings of having these two to myself. I'm coming to see that with all of my complaints, frustrations, challenges, and trials I would have been painfully lonely without MJ and Annabelle. We've become quite a team, looking out for each other, encouraging each other, passing out hugs and kisses when the sadness creeps in. It's so cool to see Annabelle picking up on this, patting her brother on the arm when he cries and saying, "good boy," then leaning in to give him a kiss. So much has changed even though to me the world stopped spinning when we left Mike on the pier. I have to say that I am sincerely proud of our family for embracing this challenge and managing to thrive in it. Mike was able to to serve our nation, stand out amongst his peers and make Department Head, obtain 2 challenging qualifications, and from the opposite side of the Earth remain involved daily in our lives. I managed to feed, bathe, and clothe our children to care for them through the nastiest stomach flu, take them to swimming, dance, music, soccer, P.E., and school, to check out parks, the zoo, and playgrounds. And after I stopped feeling sorry for myself, got some great encouragement from Mike and the kids, and got out of my own way, I managed to hit the gym or workout from home on average of 5 days a week since the first week of April and I feel great. So as we enter into the final phase of our separation I have a bit of mixed emotion. I'm thrilled that my kids will have their Daddy back and I will have my husband and best friend home with me. And slightly sad because I know that I'll have to share my hugs, kisses, and snuggles. I've kind of enjoyed that little perk. However I know that any sadness I may feel now will be immediately replaced with joy as I watch smiles wash over the faces of our children when they see that Daddy has come home.